I haven't forgotten you !!!

Honest!

Daddy's just been busy, I promise...

First up-


Happy belated Valentine's, you crazy kids!

I couldn't post, because I was donating orgasms to the 'this hot girl I know' fund, and was swept away by the spirit of generosity.

If anyone has a wheelchair they can loan her for a couple of weeks, that would be fantastic.


That's right baby!

D-scrizzle-lizzle is in the hizzle!

We've found us a singer, and have swapped bass players, and have been demo-ing and writing like crazy, and, well, the net result is- we rule, and you will come and see us, and raise your drinks high in the air, and thank the horned one we decided to pick up instruments again.

This is gonna be the best.

Almost as much fun as hacking into road signs and advertising upcoming gigs, and nonexistent cures for herpes, with the State Premiers Office as the phone number!


Who needs a reason?

Yeah, so, this is probably the hottest girl ever, like ever!

Click on it.

Enlarge it.

She's cute, right?

She looks like she knows a secret, and it's not about the wine.

She's got that look girls get when they're at the supermarket, picking up necessities before it closes, right after getting jizz-blasted by their boyfriend 10 minutes before.

Don't lie, you know exactly what I'm talking about!

Except her hair is too neat for that to have happened, so it must have been something else.

Like she's breathing in the bouquet of the wine, and remembering the night when her bi/curious friend Yvonne drank too much, and ended up threading grapes on a piece of knotted wool, and slipped them inside her like D.I.Y. ben-wa balls.

Or she's looking up into the sky, and seeing the Valentines message I wrote for her:

"Maria, the sky isn't big enough for me to write how much I adore you, and your one freckle, and that bulging vein in your left wrist, or even your semi-weird, conical boobs, like pyramids with the tops worn down...I'm almost out of gas already. But I do so want you to know..." *plane crashes*.

Or maybe she's thinking "This fucking photographer is taking too long...God, this bottle is heavy! Ooh, I'd love to cut his testes off slowly, and see how he likes it?!"

Or she just stood in some shit, and without looking down, she has frozen in place, and is thinking "That's definitely shit".

*Le sigh* Girls like that make my world go round, I swear to God.

Hopefully she's not local, and not reading this, because I've been busted too many times this week already.

The graphic designer at my Mum's company reads this on her downtimes, my Mum is at the next desk! No more pix of me then...

My old friend Bonnie in New Zealand has had a look-in, which left me feeling more than odd. I can't explain it, but I think I would have felt more comfortable if she inserted 2 fingers up my rectum, and made me her own little puppet.

Sometimes I meet people out in the world, and they have this look like the girl in the picture all night. And then, when it's "Go home you drunken bastards" time, they say "By the way...I love your blog!"

Oh my God!

The girl in the picture reads my blog!!!!

And she's thinking "I wonder how long it will take knifey to post about me?"

I just realised Henkell Vineyards are here in Victoria, so the chances of the girl in the picture being in Melbourne = roughly 100%.

I just adore being mentally unhinged sometimes, it makes life so much more fun!!!

On a serious note, if you remember me writing about my disappointment at the dealings I had with with Liam Houlihan (Youth and Religious Affairs reporter for the Herald Sun), I have posted up his article and my response to it here.

It's at the end of the post, so be patient.


This is knifey, from 'the internet'.