Friday, December 03, 2004

Rock, Porn, and...Cooking.

This one is all about one of my stranger acquaintances.
There are a few interesting facts about young Avy, that we all should know from the start.


  • She's Spanish.

  • She sings for a band in L.A. called 'Love Crash'.


  • She is very sensitive, and likes to think about life.



  • She is a porn Star.


She's got le-egs...

You may have caught her work through VCA, New Sensations, Hustler, Playboy, Platinum X , Red Light, or DVSX.


Very fancy. What does it say?

Avy's not so good at English, so our conversations normally go something (exactly) like this:

Me: "Hey Avy, what's happening?"
Avy: "Why rock guys are so motherfuckers??? i dont have enough time to pick the pieces of my heart , to much damn ... all the time."
Me: "I know what you mean...I think."
Avy: "I specialize in watching porn at lunch time , so if i invite u to come over dont freak out. U will have two kinds of chicken to eat."
Me: "That's cool, I dig chicken yo."
Avy: "I need to fuck more rock stars. I need to fuck more young girls ...over 18 of course. I need love, love comes for those who's seeking, love hides in the nearer corner, love hides in molecular structures ..."
Me: "Don't get me started on love. Or molecular structures either".
Avy: "I dance naked in my room."
Me: "Same! Especially if Daphne and Celeste are on the radio."
Avy: "Not if yur in my pussie baby!"
Me: "Can we eat chicken first?"

That sort of thing...

So you can imagine how hard it was to extract an intelligible recipe out of her, without having to dance naked, eat chicken, or make the hot sex.

But I did it!!!

So may I present to you, our special guest Chef du Jour...


AVY LEE ROTH, AND HER EASY SALSA!!!

Ingredients:

1 clove garlic
2 green onions
1 to 3 jalapeno peppers (remove the seeds if you don't want it too hot)
28 oz can chopped tomatoes, drained (reserve 1 Tbsp of the juice)
1 Tbsp lemon juice (or squeeze 1/2 a fresh lemon)
6 fresh cilantro leaves
salt and pepper

Method:

Put first 3 ingredients in a food processor and pulse (or if you don't have a food processor, mince them with a knife)

Add tomatoes, 1 Tbsp of the tomato juice, ! Tbsp fresh lemon, cilantro leaves and salt and pepper to taste. Pulse LIGHTLY (you don't want soup *grin*)

Again, if you don't have a food processor. just chop your tomatoes up a bit more than they come in a can and mix all the ingredients together in a bowl.

Put a little sprig of cilantro on top to decorate.

And there you have it!

By the way, if any of you work for Wicked Pictures or Vivid, and feel like giving Avy something back, drop me an email and make her dreams come true.

Happy cooking...



This is knifey, from 'the internet'.

18 comments:

Scott B said...

jesus Knifey...you like ...know all these top rock chicks, stars and porn babes.

I am jealous.

when we gonna get together and do some hard partying then?

Scott

Scott B said...

actually seriously
you know any loverly porn ladies in the UK
send them my way I have some work.

damn that sounds sleazy even for me. I wont delete it though just in case...haha....

are you a drummer Knifey? just asking coz you have that drummer-ness about you. my favourite drummer is around no more. he was an artist too like you...I loved him but he lost it for some reason.

Havent quite worked out what you do or are yet, I just keep flying by here every now and then. Kitten has a good trail for me not sure she is even aware of it. These things come and go though.

out here in Blog world I am hunting things spiritual... so , even though I love humour, I got this serious side to me thats looking. not sure what for, just living and aware I guess. So apologies if you are aghast reading what I write...

but shoot from the hip is my motto, at the moment at least. I am in a rush so dont beat about the bushes.

you seem too fucking talented to me if you dont mind my saying so. What talent I have is somewhat wasted which pisses me off but thats my problem, it's an issue between the gods and goddesses of destiny and me. we'll work it out eventually i am sure, why else have talent? it would make no sense.
I feel like I should have become something naturally but it didnt happen that way. I dont get that. I work my ass off to achieve realisation of my talents only to find myself still stuck in a stupid fucking 9 to 5 city job with no clear escape and massive debts. But thats cool. the spiritual side of life is all about us whatever we are doing and maybe it is supposed to be this way for me.

I still recognise it in others. more because it can be such a fucking burden. talent that is.

anyway I find it a bit hard to keep up with your blogs so busy as I am writing shit on mine. But if you have a comment or something you want to say pop to my blog and do it. I probably wont find this particular post again very easily.

here's to ya mate. hope all is cool. you are a funny guy and fucking talented too, like I said. but like I also said. that shits such a burden sometimes. wot you rekon.

ciao for now, gotta go, gotta go....piaow

scott.

Psst, it's me! said...

Who is that guy? Sheesh.

The Pink Kitty said...

I linked you, hope you don't mind :)

Scott B said...

just someone who swims deep Mara.
besides, who are you?

knifey said...

ok...
SCOTT.

i love you man, i seriously do.
i read your blogs all the time, and don't comment because they get me thinking and i generally don't have a succinct answer.
you are one of the seekers of this world, and i find your honest outpourings and your search so honourable and beautiful.
i feel intensely protective of you, and i would definitely like to meet up next time i'm in the u.k.
but i don't drink/do drugs/pary, so we'd just have to eat curry, then go check some drum'n'bass, and attempt to talk over it.
in answer to your questions, i make guitars for a living, as well as doing odd things like art, design, and helping friends out who have their own businesses.
i am a guitar player, not so good at drums. but i love most stringed instruments (especially asian ones).
i will look into who i know porn-wise in your neck of the woods, i'm sure we'll be able to find someone to get you started in earnest. someone spiritual.
i don't think i'm talemted in the least. but i know i work very hard to produce what little i put out there.
i feel like a day has been wasted if i haven't created something. it drives me, and it's a total curse.
anyway, i'm going to do my next post for you, because i think our heads are in pretty comparable places today.
bigg upps to the u.k. massive- j.

MARA- that's scott, and he's one of the good ones.

PINK KITTY- that is so not a problem, thank you. are you in san francisco? we should talk.

sugar and spice said...

knifey... you're just like a marshmallow.
ahhhh

i have a recipe, i'll make you some one day.

Jess said...

She's a bit of a minx, isn't she? Grrrr!

knifey said...

SUGAR- what? discarded pig body parts?

JESS- YOU ARE !!!!
i've gotta get back to google to keep churning out "may i touch your penis ausculture" search termz 4 eva.

sugar and spice said...

i can totally source some kosher gelatine. i've got some in the lab actually. not a pig in sight.

knifey said...

i still don't feel so good about this comparison.

god, you must be the best cook eva!

sugar and spice said...

rest assurred, it's a compliment.

like saying you're a warm fuzzy, but with food.

"best cook eva" ah. ya.

knifey said...

i'm not fuzzy, i'm FIZLI !

besides, i shave...downstairs anyway.

Scott B said...

wow Knifey, I am touched, I really am.
any time you are in London, UK gimme a shout.

I half expected to come back here to find some blazing comment from you to leave your groupies alone or something. and Mara giving me some more of the somewhat thoughtless and shallow reaction that I get on a daily basis from most people. the world sucks in that respect and I have very little tolerance for people who cant wake up to that.... Mara I am sure you are better than that but if, as I see from your blog, your only interests in life are money and 'the right man' you have a veritable shit-storm of an education coming your way. Watch out for the creeps too. looks like you attract them, and thats got a spiritual level to it, believe me you need people like me around when that shit comes knocking on your door. in short - dont tutt at gypsies honey, you aint that fkin special ;)

Anyway yea I was coming back here to see all was well and suddenly I have my name in lights. fuckin a! cheers knifey. every little bit of good publicity helps my cause to authenticate me as a friendly devil. Most people shoot first and ask questions later, so I appreciate that dood.

You are right, we have a strange level of compadre and similarity going on here. I like your mate too , whats his name ...hang on....normallysober.blogspot.com....he's a funny guy.

yea you are a scholar and a gentleman and I shall if you dont mind add you to my links list so I can pop back here more easily.

Any time you have a spiritual question I may be able to help with, my door is open dood. Most things in this life have beneath them an iceburg of depth if we are to make sense of them and extricate ourselves from the ones we need to and quite often it aint pretty. it's a dirty job but someones got to do it.

You have taught me a lot just reading your posts. I love that edgey humour, makes me happy to read it, I need something to lighten me up sometimes, and at the same time you are as real as they come. that's quality to admire. nice one. the world wont change you Knifey, dont worry , you have got the connection you need to keep it real.

anyway enough back slapping.

take care

thanks again
scott

Kitten said...

Now look what I started.

:0 !

Scott B said...

I have had this song running round my head since coming to your blog...little quiz for you geniuses....who wrote these lyrics.....

Many people tell you that they're your friend
You believe them
You need them
For what's round the river bend
Make sure that you're receiving the signals they send
'Cause brother you've only got two hands to lend
Maybe there's someone who makes you weep
And some nights loom up ahead
When you're asleep
Some days there's things on your mind you should keep
Sometimes it's tougher to look than to leap
Better watch out for the Skin Deep
Better watch out for the Skin Deep

One day the track that you're climbing gets steep
Your emotions are frayed
And your nerves are starting to creep
Just remember the days
As long as the time that you keep
Better watch out for the Skin Deep
Better watch out for the Skin Deep

Kitten said...

OOOh! I love quizzes.

I'll take "The Stranglers" for $1500, Alex........

Scott B said...

and the winner is!
Kitty!

yea....and for those lovers of The Stranglers
past this puppy into your browser and download it

I give you The Stranglers, skin deep....

http://www.wonlife.co.uk/music/skin_deep.mp3